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• TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF •

BUILD SELF-RESPECT

Have a great time!

Be sweet on the inside

never let go

KETCHUP III

3/7/2017

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Work
Well… I’ve made my decision… people around me hesitated a lot… but in the end it all seems to be taking the right direction J As, I’ve said earlier. I’m determined to concentrate on giving my best and make this job the best job I could have. As a last minute surprise, one of my friends, who is hard-worker, ambitious and a very good person also decided to stay. Fun to see that when we make tough decisions all pieces then fall into the right places.

Home
These are unstable times with my husband now looking for a new job. Expectations and anxieties do try and make our ‘home environment’ cloudy but we remain confident, grateful and are finding more and more value in simple things. Hard times teach us great lessons.

New interest: Poetry
I’ve written before about the Portuguese poet Fernando Pessoa. I have now learned that my late grandfather used to recite poems to my mother and siblings (11 children!) and am now trying to learn something of this beautiful hobby.
I’ve tried to declaim a transformed version of this poem at my 35th birthday.

Fernando Pessoa – Omen

Love, when revealing itself
Knows not how to reveal
One knows well how to look at her
But knows not what to say


The one who wants to say what he feels
Knows not what he should say
Shall he speak: Seems like he's lying
Shall he stay quiet: Seems like he forgot it all


Oh, but if she could only guess
If only she could listen through his gaze
And if only a gaze was enough
For her to know she's being loved!


However, the one who feels too much, stays quiet
The one who wants to speak his heart out
Ends up with no soul or speech
Ends up alone, entirely!


But, if all of this would make her understand
Everything I don't risk telling her
Then I won't have to say a word
For I am already speaking to her


I’ll keep working at this. Loving it!

Reading…
I’ve finished the book ‘Lean in’ by Sheryl Sandberg and highly recommend it! Very good stories, full of life and heart, and with some good lessons that will be useful for my journey. I’ll share my favorite points about communication with you. Great insights:

  • Truth Authentic communication is the basis for successful relationships at home and real effectiveness at work.
  • Communication works best when we combine appropriateness with authenticity, finding that sweet spot where opinions are not brutally honest but delicately honest.
 
  • When communicating hard truths, less is often more. The ability to listen is as important as the ability to speak.
 
  • Reflecting someone’s point of view clarifies the disagreement and becomes a starting point for resolution. Being aware of a problem is the first to correcting it. It is nearly impossible to know how our actions are perceived by another: ask directly!
 
  • When people are open and honest, thanking them publicly encourages them to continue while sending a powerful signal to others. Humor can be an amazing tool for delivering an honest message in a good-humored way. [A recent study found that “sense of humor” was the phrase most frequently used to describe the most effective leaders.]
 
  • Sharing emotions builds deeper relationships.
 
  • Motivation comes from working on things we care about. To really care about others, we have to understand them – what they like and dislike, what they feel as well as think. Emotion drives both men and women and influences every decision we make. Recognizing the role emotions play and being willing to discuss them makes us better managers, partners, and peers. We are moving toward at least blurring the line between personal and professional.
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    ABOUT ME

    My name is T. S. Coelho and I live in Lisbon, Portugal, with my husband and three kids. I work in the asset management industry, managing an equities fund.

    I decided to start this project in 2014 after realizing that my ‘grey finance world’ needed the color of writing after hours.

    The decision on the subject to write about was easy to figure out: I combined the need to figure out how to feel healthy even when I sit for about 50 hours every week to my life dream of social justice – well, in this case it’s more about justice in the office – if talented, hardworking, shy people hide behind their desks, others will take advantage and fill in superior positions with higher rewards, higher recognition and more important than that greater personal fulfillment.
    ​
    What I try to do here is to provide the means for extremely valuable people to find the confidence they need to succeed and to live a happier life. Enjoy!


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